D Effect

Currently I’m involved in a project I’m doing ‘probono’ for artsy and middle class kids. Imagine me… poor… freelance media worker… doing that for people who are in a much better place than I am. Well… at least for now my friend said. The thing is aimed to get some sort of sponsorship or something but good luck to us.

But well, I think the stories were gonna do are okay. Not really something I’d normally do for free but they make me feel like it’s my generation they’re talking about.

Anyway, last night was the first production meeting I ever attended with the team and I wasn’t impressed with the fact that after being an hour late from calltime, I was the third person to arrive there and our meeting started more than an hour later.

The people were nice actually, very rakenrol but still… I wasn’t that convinced yet if I was doing a good thing for my own good or what.


Yesterday was kind of great for me actually. We we’re still waiting for people to arrive when I got the call from a coveted workshop I’ve been dying to get into and learned that I got in. The call was also an inquiry if I wanted to apply for a writing job.

Great right?

On a regular day… after receiving such news, I would be celebrating with close friends with alcohol in our beer bellies. But I was… and still am… under the weather… and even when drinks were free last night… I had to control myself… or else I’ll be shooting this weekend with a runny nose. Though, the colds didn’t stop me from smoking. LOL

So, imagine me already feeling great and thought that was the best news I ever got in months but… like I said, yesterday was indeed a very peculiarly interesting day. Because like a cathartic Japanese film… that wasn’t the climax… just the start of a plateau… at least of euphoria for me… after the build-up ends. LOL

It’s because of the last important person to wait for finally arrived… and dang… he was worth the long wait!

Let’s just call this super hot and smart and awfully corny guy ‘D’.

And just when I thought fate was really getting kinder to me last night, apparently… it had some more surprises to give to me. ‘D’ and I will have to work closer because I’ll be under his call.

Oh, yes Sir… your call, please… I’ll give you whatever you want from me. LMAO


Truth is, I had to run somewhere after that meeting but decided to stay because ‘D’ was so magnetic... and I… I was so pathetic… and trying my best not to be obviously drooling. Hahahah!!!


When I decided to go, ‘D’ joined us and I obviously enjoyed our jeep ride to Cubao even when my sinuses were already making eksena. Pero dedma. Nothing’s gonna stop my moment with ‘D’ in that jeepney… not the harurot music blasting ride… not the echoing noise of trucks and trucks of bumbero speeding on the opposite lane. I fought hard not to giggle like a little girl and felt a tinge of ache in my heart when got off before everybody else. Naks!


Oh, there also was no free food in that meeting last night but thanks to ‘D’… even that didn’t matter and my fate to do the project was sealed. Walking along the street of Palawan and Starlites to my friend’s place I was in bliss even when my tummy’s already started eating my intestines and my knees were already wobbly.


Before turning into bed hours later, I had my very late dinner. Like always, there was struggle sleeping but last night… it was brief… thanks to the carbs.

I was wishing I’d dream of ‘D’ but never really bet on it. Texted my friend to pathetically ask… no, beg her… to tell me that ‘D’ is gay or at least bisexual. She said, she’s never asked so she doesn’t know. But hearing that… I thought, at least it crossed my friend’s mind… meaning she/they also sense something.

And though at one point in our meeting ‘D’ called me ‘Pare’… but I thought… so do other closeted guys who flirt with me. I too thought that he was a little warmer than your usual straight guy but then so do all endangered gentlemen species.

Before I dozed off, I was trying to recall the exact way his face looked like.

I couldn’t.

Maybe because he’s sort of familiar. Perhaps, we’ve already met or even briefly worked together before… he told me he also had long hair before his hairline started receding… but whatever, I find it sexy along with his tiny beer belly and pretty fingers. Or perhaps, he just reminds me of other guys I know or admire.

I even secretly wish that he’s the guy I had a crush on during the dinner after the tribute event for a national artist I was involved in last April. Because if so… he’s so potentially available! I wish… I wish… I WISH!!!

So, after playing with those few thoughts in my head, I was already being consumed by sinusitis… and I fell asleep. It was around 2am.


Of course. Yes. Would I be writing this if I didn’t dream of him? Duh!

But I guess, I still would. LOL

I’m so loving fate for over 12 hours now because in my dream, for some awesome reason, ‘D’ and I were side by side in bed, trying to sleep. It was so delicious, I had to drag myself out of bed to attempt to write everything I can recall of it.


Yeah… others would’ve probably wanted to keep dreaming but it was the movie-like dialogue that made me want to wake up. And of course, even in that dream… I didn’t want to have sex with him… yet.

Thinking of it now, I could’ve at least kissed him there. Hayst!

Yes… I’m that awfully attracted… bigtime… to him. I swear… I know I’m already sounding crazy and shameless right now… but what the heck. Sue me!


Woke up at past 6… just a few hours of sleep there, I realized. It’s quite sad that even after a bowl of oats I still couldn’t remember the other details and juicy dialogue in my dream.

Darn, I badly needed cigarettes but I really couldn’t compromise my weekend shoot.


But I remember feeling his hairy arm on my arm… his breath on my neck… and a few lines enough for me to start writing a scene for a future story.

The dream was simple actually and so not typically romantic. So, we were both trying to sleep… probably after a shoot. And then, I realized that he’s the hugger type sleeper. He bear-hugged me in the dream and I told him “D, this is torture”. He didn’t respond to that so I said “I swear that if that cock doesn’t twitch a bit, this is harassment!”

That was all I remember from the dream. I know that we exchanged a few more words and it was about bargaining ‘doing it’ but I refused because I thought that he’s either straight and just too liberal and curious or worse… simply not horny for me if gay.

But I just can’t stop laughing recalling those lines. Care for one more luck? I wish I’d dream of the replay of the dream.


I feel sleepy now, it’s almost 10am. And I think this is all I needed to write about. Will post this later online. And I’m excited to see him on fb later. Yey!


For now, 13 hours later… ‘D’ still tops my list. Couldn’t think of my other boys really. LOL

The effect is like… he’s blocked everyone out. Even my excitement for the workshop next month can’t beat it. Right now, it’s just him… ‘D’… and me.