Who Do You See... Your Lover or Your Ideal Lover?

(September 10, 2011, 02:34:14 PM )
People usually do this... they meet someone who qualifies for the type of person they want to have as a partner.

Then when lucky and the person likes them too... these people begin to see the person as the ideal lover that they've always wanted and fail to see the real person.

In reality, we all should strive to become a better lover for the other half.

If the guy or girl we are with fairly trades compromises with us, we are in a good healthy relationship. However we must always keep in mind to see THAT growing love... NOT our idealized HIM/HER. Because if you keep doing this... it's a recipe for a disaster and ultimately the collapse of your relationship.

A relationship is like running in doubles. You got to be running side by side... at pace with each other. If the other one is lagging behind, you ought to compromise the speed and encourage him/her to keep going... because if your intention is more like getting ahead... then that defeats the purpose of running together and winning together, right?

I do not believe in what others say... that we should never be in a relationship to change the other person. Because in reality, all of us eventually evolve whether with a partner's intervention or not.

I believe that as caring partners, it is part of the relationship to help the other develop better sensibilities and achieve a better kind of life.

Now, it is different from getting in a relationship and trying to change your partner into the ideal kind of lover you've always been fantasizing about.